Hello dear reader, how are you today? I hope you are having a good time as you read this? Thank you for stopping by my blog to engage with my content, I appreciate and celebrate you. Today’s blog post is going to be concise and I am here to challenge you to STOP YOUR FEARS BEFORE YOUR FEARS STOPS YOU.
“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
–Dale Carnegie
Most times, what we are afraid of is also afraid of us. This brings to mind an encounter I had with a dog one time. You see when I was younger I used to be very afraid of dogs. I loved puppies but once they are fully grown, I dread them. I remember visiting a friend who had a dog. In the past when I visited, the dog was always in its cage. But on this fateful day, I had no idea that it was released and allowed to move around in the compound. I had entered the compound before realizing the dog was on the loose. First, the fear that gripped me made me freeze as I wasn’t sure of what to do next. And in a split second, I had to figure out what my next line of action would be as the dog raced towards me.
As if in a movie and slow motion, I look around for anything to use as a weapon of defence against this beat that was heading my way. The only thing I could find was a mortared brick lying in the corner, I guess it is being used to stop the tires of a car when the tires are being changed. I was so glad I could at least find something. And before I knew it, the dog was just a few feet away from me, with the fear in me and as a means of survival, I also charged towards the dog with the brick in my and as if to smash its head. Even as I type this I can’t stop myself from laughing at what happened next. As if in a cartoon scene, I watched the dog halt, with its tail tucked in and scampered away from me. And at that moment, still very much afraid I also ran into my friend’s apartment before the dog changed its mind and come back for me.
Dear reader, why am I sharing this story with you, sometimes – not all the time, because I have watched videos of ferocious dogs attacking strangers and you don’t want to try this trick with a rottweiler – that breed is mean! I digress. Sometimes in life, that very thing you are afraid of is also afraid of you. And sometimes life presents to us these things we are so afraid of to test how badly we want to get whatever it is we need which is on the other side of the fear we face. So you’ve to look your fear in the face and do exactly the opposite of what it’s suggesting to you. I love the way that Sadhguru explained fear in less than 2min. See the video below
Did you catch that? Your fear is not real!!!! Little wonder someone defined fear as FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL. And it makes a lot of sense. I came upon an article that highlighted some very weird fears that we have as humans and one of them made me laugh out loud. Phobophobia – the fear of being afraid. Like can you even imagine that some of us are even afraid of being afraid? By this, we allow what is not real or what is in the past and we have no control over it to stop us from enjoying what is in the now. The writer of the article ended with a line I found profound and I quote “ Don’t wait until it’s too late to know your fears. Fear is a natural reaction to the challenges of life and leadership. To grow, change and excel, we must know fear.”You can read the full article HERE.
So, as we journey into the year 2022, what fear are you going to know and overcome? Could it be that the fear of failing is why you are yet to take action on that goal of yours? Or even more interesting, could it be the fear of succeeding when you give it a shot that freezes you and stops you from acting because you are not sure how to handle being in the light or the centre of attraction? Whatever your reasons are for your fears no that they are not real and it will only take you acting despite your fear to realize that it wasn’t real after all.
One way that I have managed some of my fears is to ask myself what is the worse that can happen? Once I imagine what the worst-case scenario is, I then gear up for whatever the consequences would be and take the action anyways. For instance, I am afraid of rejection, yes, that is in the present tense because I am still working my way out of it. And I do this by practising ahead and being okay when I get a NO. So I ask myself, what is the worse that can happen if I asked this person for so and so? Possible answers to this question are :
- They might say NO – and my reaction would be, well, it means I can now move on to the next opportunity. Just like I learned from a lovely 70yrs old Queen who said to me at a fashion show when I interviewed her by the media wall. Don’t be afraid of the word NO, because it means Next Opportunity. See the interview below.
- They might laugh at me – my reaction would be, I will join them and make myself look silly that way I don’t dwell on the negative feeling of being laughed at because I am also laughing at myself.
- They might just say YES – and in this case, I will show my in-depth gratitude because they showed me grace even when they had the choice not to.
So you see, with this strategy I can practice embracing rejection and knowing that it’s not often about me, it’s just probably not the right time, or I am asking the wrong person. Once more I am challenging you today stop allowing your fear hold you back, stop it before it stops you.
In the comments, share with me one fear you have that you will work on overcoming this year. I can’t wait to read from you.
P.S.
If you are afraid of starting your podcast, then I am here to help you overcome that fear, by showing you step by step how to get past that fear and take action towards your desire to become a podcaster. Want to have a conversation to clarify if podcasting is for you? Then connect with me let’s talk and find out how I can help you.